I Give Up!

Though I accepted Christ at the age of nine, if I want to be honest I have to admit that for much of my life I did not enjoy the close relationship with God that He wants to have with each of His children. His desire is for me to be on fire for Him, instead of the lukewarm state I have found myself in so many times. I know from experience it is possible for a person to attend church and even fill many positions, while still having a heart that does not burn with passion for God. I have, at times, gone through the motions of being a Christian and doing what is expected of me, without my heart really being in it. I have made a decision to no longer live that way.  My heart’s desire is to serve the Lord with everything within me, laying aside every weight and sin that holds me back.

I have found the Christian life to be such a struggle because what I attempted to project in my outward life was not what was really going on in my heart. Letting go of my own will and embracing the will of my Father – that has been my most difficult task. But, oh the peace I experienced when I finally gave in! I read recently that we can have good intentions, but if our intentions are not our true desires, we will not follow through. I have spent much time asking God to change my true desires to conform to His, and to do a work in my life that only He can do. He is in the process of doing that, and it is sometimes uncomfortable for me, but I have a peace in my spirit I have never known before. It is amazing that the Lord can give us peace even while He is pruning us and making us uncomfortable.  I want Him to continue the process, so that my life will be pleasing to Him.

As I observe the lives of other Christians, I am convinced I am not the only one who must deal with the issue of submission to the will of God. We are independent creatures and want to do it our own way. I believe the Lord draws us to Himself and desires to change us to be like Him. It is up to us to submit to His will. I pray that He will help you and me to become the people He created us to be, learning to lay aside our own desires in order to follow His plan.

Scriptures for Reflection

. . . let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us. (Hebrews 12:1)

I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman. Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit. (John 15:1-2)

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11)